Most Fantasy Worlds Are Pretty Crappy, Actually

[rowyn]

I first saw this meme on Twitter via Geoge Takei, but here's the image:



And I had to stop and think: would I actually want to LIVE in any of these places?

Let's start with places I definitely don't want to go to:

* Westeros: are you INSANE? It'd be like moving to medieval England during the War of the Roses. No. Hell no. Why is this even on here?
* Camelot: Okay, now it's medieval England just BEFORE the War of Roses, which will ruin everything forever. Still hell no.
* Wonderland: I think mixing LSD and mescaline would be safer and less terrifying. Pass.
* Neverland: The fairies only liked little kids, and I am not one. So I probably wouldn't get to fly. This setting was at best rustic and primitive for adults, assuming the pirates don't get you. Pass.
* Middle Earth: Elves get to be immortal or nearly so, which is cool if you're an elf. But the general society is still rustic and primitive and I'm still going to be a human. I don't think women even get to be wizards in this world. Also, is this before or after Sauron trashes everything just prior to his defeat? Either way ... I think I have to pass.

That leaves:

* Narnia: It's been about thirty years since I read the Narnia books. The biggest plus here was the talking animals, and IIRC magic usage was not confined to a tiny number of people. I think I need a refresher course before I can decide if I'd want to live here or not. Do I get to go to perfected version of Narnia that exists after the last book or do I have to survive the war in it first? I am not sure I like my odds.
* Hogwarts: am I going to be a Muggle? Then pass. If I can learn magic -- is this before or after the final confrontation with Voldemort? If it's before, maybe I can warn Harry et al before various disasters hit. Well, Harry probably wouldn't listen. Dumbledore might, though. Anyway, this setting is slightly suckier than the real world if you can't use magic (because you will randomly get killed by Death Eaters and whatnot), and perhaps slightly better if you can, assuming you don't get tortured by Death Eaters or those happiness-devouring jailers or killed during a brutal wizard war that decimates the population. Umm.

I have the bad feeling that I'd be happier staying home. The modern world is surprisingly awesome. I think I'd probably take the Hogwarts option, though. I'd never forgive myself if I wimped out on seeing magic at ALL, just because it was dangerous and I might be horribly tortured or possessed or compelled to kill my friends or ... yeah. I don't think those were *normal* fates in the setting. Maybe. It was hard to tell. Anyway. I'd re-read both sets of books first and make sure I don't want to go for Narnia, and try Hogwarts if not. Wish me luck. I'd need it. O_O;;;

Comments

[whitefangedwolf.livejournal.com]

I reject the premise of the meme because it's pretty horrifying if you think though the ramifications.

First, let's look at the relatively inconsequential settings:

Westeros and Middle-Earth are clearly alternate realities so they can be safely ignored.

Wonderland and Neverland are places with connections to Earth but have no majorly noticeable effects.

Narnia had clear Earth ties and clear ties to real-world history. Considering the end of the Last Battle and relative ages of characters, the Narnia seen in the books is long gone and not a option for visiting. The Narnia in Aslan's Country appears to be only accessible to those from Earth who died, so carefully consider if you really want to take that option.

Now, let's look at the settings that could affect the here-and-now:

Camelot's set in an idealized fictional past. If real, theoretically King Arthur could return, according to certain legends, but so far he hasn't shown up.

The existence of Hogwarts means that the Harry Potter setting is real. The only good news is that all timeline calculations place Voldemort as being long dead. The bad news is that you are a Muggle and all of the horrible terrible nasty spells that can be used are real. Don't forget that memory-altering charms are also in effect, so anything you think you remember might not be true and valued memories may have been erased.

In conclusion, let's replace Hogwarts with Oz. Oz is nicer to visit and is isolated from the rest of the world, which causes less trouble for non-residents.

[the-gneech.livejournal.com]

Suspiciously familiar icon you have, there. ;)

-TG

[rowyn]

Oz isn't perfect, but it's definitely an easy win over any of the other places. Baum was actually trying to make a place people would want to live. :)

[jordangreywolf.livejournal.com]

If there were a "like" button, I'd click it on your observations. :D

Half the fun I've had in this exercise is just in considering the IMPLICATIONS of the choices and how this would alter my perception of reality to even have this option. ;) And, yeah, with a lot of fantasy settings, it would be really neat to visit if I were the Star Character or at least one of the privileged class ... but not so much if I'm just some random Muggle tourist. I suppose the same is true when I daydream about the idea of frivolously visiting ages in the past (in some magical way that ensures that I won't create some sort of temporal paradox that snuffs out all life as we know it as soon as I step through the portal); all too often, there are places I'd really love to see and experience, but it would only be worthwhile if I looked the part, had a reliable escape route in case of things going awry, and had a whole lot of spending money. That's a lot more in the way of "if" than simply stepping through a door impulsively and dealing with whatever's on the other side. ;)