Most Fantasy Worlds Are Pretty Crappy, Actually

[rowyn]

I first saw this meme on Twitter via Geoge Takei, but here's the image:



And I had to stop and think: would I actually want to LIVE in any of these places?

Let's start with places I definitely don't want to go to:

* Westeros: are you INSANE? It'd be like moving to medieval England during the War of the Roses. No. Hell no. Why is this even on here?
* Camelot: Okay, now it's medieval England just BEFORE the War of Roses, which will ruin everything forever. Still hell no.
* Wonderland: I think mixing LSD and mescaline would be safer and less terrifying. Pass.
* Neverland: The fairies only liked little kids, and I am not one. So I probably wouldn't get to fly. This setting was at best rustic and primitive for adults, assuming the pirates don't get you. Pass.
* Middle Earth: Elves get to be immortal or nearly so, which is cool if you're an elf. But the general society is still rustic and primitive and I'm still going to be a human. I don't think women even get to be wizards in this world. Also, is this before or after Sauron trashes everything just prior to his defeat? Either way ... I think I have to pass.

That leaves:

* Narnia: It's been about thirty years since I read the Narnia books. The biggest plus here was the talking animals, and IIRC magic usage was not confined to a tiny number of people. I think I need a refresher course before I can decide if I'd want to live here or not. Do I get to go to perfected version of Narnia that exists after the last book or do I have to survive the war in it first? I am not sure I like my odds.
* Hogwarts: am I going to be a Muggle? Then pass. If I can learn magic -- is this before or after the final confrontation with Voldemort? If it's before, maybe I can warn Harry et al before various disasters hit. Well, Harry probably wouldn't listen. Dumbledore might, though. Anyway, this setting is slightly suckier than the real world if you can't use magic (because you will randomly get killed by Death Eaters and whatnot), and perhaps slightly better if you can, assuming you don't get tortured by Death Eaters or those happiness-devouring jailers or killed during a brutal wizard war that decimates the population. Umm.

I have the bad feeling that I'd be happier staying home. The modern world is surprisingly awesome. I think I'd probably take the Hogwarts option, though. I'd never forgive myself if I wimped out on seeing magic at ALL, just because it was dangerous and I might be horribly tortured or possessed or compelled to kill my friends or ... yeah. I don't think those were *normal* fates in the setting. Maybe. It was hard to tell. Anyway. I'd re-read both sets of books first and make sure I don't want to go for Narnia, and try Hogwarts if not. Wish me luck. I'd need it. O_O;;;

Comments

[octantis.livejournal.com]

Hahaha, I had been thinking the same thing! Especially frickin' Westeros! The books paint a horrifying world of death and rape, and last time I glanced at the show, a shadow monster assassin was crawling out of a woman's vagoo. Jebus cripes.

[rowyn]

If anyone has ever picked Westeros in this meme, I seriously want to know what the heck they were thinking.

One of my criteria when writing Silver Scales was that I wanted a setting that I'd be reasonably happy to live in as an ordinary person. :) It's got some pretty nasty faults, but it's still pretty good for most inhabitants, and has some readily-available perks over modern America.

But if I was going to pick a fictional world to live in, I'd probably go with something like John C. Wright's _The Golden Age_, which is a super-high-tech setting with every kind of comfort available to virtually everyone. A post-scarcity society on Earth, where the only things you still need money for are stuff like deep space exploration or terraforming projects.

[octantis.livejournal.com]

I have to assume it's someone reeeeally enamored of the knightly pageantry.

Now, if you could bring some modern world stuff with you ala Connecticut Yankee, would that change anything? ... Looking at it, I'm not really sure how these would be improved by assault rifles and iPods. Do you suppose ringwraiths and the Witch King are bulletproof?

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

If they're swordproof, they're probably also bulletproof. Bullets aren't magic, and the swords in that setting often were. n.n

Maybe the people who choose Westeros are planning on bringing a small army's worth of modern weapons to clean up the setting?

Whereever I went, I'd want to bring the internet with me. I'm not sure how that would be feasible, unless sympathetic magic worked perhaps? Once connected to wifi, always connected to wifi!

[octantis.livejournal.com]

Yeah, probably. Maybe you could have mystical arborang bullets cast by dwarves or elves! :D Mithril would probably be too light to use...

I'm sure we could assume we had an inter dimensional router. Maybe a palantir with an Ethernet port. XD

[rowyn]

Sythyry and Delight both have various levels of Internet service in World Tree. :D

[rowyn]

Bringing some technology or scientific knowledge along might make the world suck les, but I don't think it's going to change the world to make it as good as comfortable as modern America regardless. :D