Still Alive

[rowyn]

I am not really sure what I've been doing this month, other than "not the things on my to-do list".

I went to Conflation in St. Louis last weekend with Corwyn, and took of Friday and Monday so I wouldn't be as pressed for time as usual. It was a little stressful. I had to rent a car and deal with insurance, and did all the driving because Corwyn doesn't have insurance (or a car) and it gets pricier the more drivers you have to deal with insuring. Car rentals can be cheap but insurance never is. :/ 80% of my con wardrobe doesn't fit any more, so I didn't bring as many outfits with me as usual.

I still had someone commenting in the consuite on how often I change clothing. "Every time I see you you're wearing something new!"

A gentleman present who knew me a little better said, "Hah! This is nothing. Some years at Contra she changed every half-hour."

"Every half hour?" I scoffed. "Don't be ridiculous. I've never changed that often. Every hour, tops."

Chaos Emporium, a little shop that stocks cheap costume and jewelry mostly imported from China, was vending there, and I bought a ton of stuff from them because I am unable to resist cheap gaudy things. Including one entire outfit, which made me happy because I had been sad about not having any new outfits to wear. They also had a bunch of tiny hats that were (a) cheap and (b) had hair-clip style attachments that actually worked. (The vast majority of pin-on tiny hats that I've seen do not stay on via pin very well, if at all.) So I bought three more tiny hats to add to my tiny-hat collection. I may have a problem.

I had a good time at Conflation: a couple of people even came up and danced with me at the Saturday-night dance, which doesn't happen that often. (I pretty much always dance if there is dancing going on, mostly by myself.) I spent three hours drawing during the figure-drawing session. I didn't feel like I had any deep conversations or connected with people in a profound way, but I got to see people I see rarely, like Mark and bradhicks, and met some new people whom I might remember by name and/or face next year. I made my Save vs Hiding in Hotel Room for most of the con. I will call it a win.

I am finding it increasingly hard to extract myself from my routine to do things like this. Even something as simple as going out to a party for an evening makes me anxious and stressed. I feel like I am acquiring an anxiety disorder and I don't know how to stop it.

I think next month, I'm going to simplify my goals list so my focus is less scattered and I don't feel like I am Failing At All the Things.

Comments

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

*giggles at your tiny hat habit*

[tuftears.livejournal.com]

*purrrs on Rowyn* A little slack is good. ^_^

[telnar.livejournal.com]

An aside on making insurance cheaper: Most premium credit cards (Visa Signature, World MasterCard and such) offer supplemental collision insurance for rental cars. While it's worth checking the language for a particular credit card agreement to make sure, at least some of them will supplement not having collision insurance at all by providing full collision coverage. That doesn't provide any liability coverage, so it's a better fit for someone with an old car with no collision insurance than for someone with no car at all.

[rowyn]

Right; I wouldn't worry about collision insurance if I had only liability insurance. But I can't rent a car without liability insurance, and neither Enterprise nor a regular insurer (AFAIK; I did not spend hours talking to different insurers to see if there was one who would) will let you pay for only liability insurance if you don't have a car.

[jorrocks-j.livejournal.com]

Costume pictures? Pretty please?

[rowyn]

I should note that I don't costume so much as "play dress up". I haven't had many pictures of me taken in the last several years, but I did a round-up of links of me dressing up at cons a couple of years ago, here: http://rowyn.livejournal.com/428244.html

[rowyn]

And I just remembered that you were following my LJ back then, so you'll have seen that post before. Whoops! :)

[jorrocks-j.livejournal.com]

Yes I was, but I don't think I remember clicking on all those links.

The Pirate costume is glorious! Do you have a picture of you standing up in it?