Dear Me:

[rowyn]

prester_scott did this a few weeks ago. I don't know how the original meme went and I'm too lazy to check. But it was something about "what would you tell your seventeen year-old self?" and that's what I'll write.

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I have to start with this: you know all those people who've been telling you "These are the best years of your life" and "being an adult is so much harder than being a kid"? Most. Pernicious. Lie. EV4R. Being a kid sucks. It gets better the older you get. No, really. Yeah, presumably at some point the body deteriorating outweighs the advantages of age but I'm 37 and haven't gotten there yet. Would not trade places with you, kid, not if you paid me.

The working world is much easier than you think it is. Getting a job is kind of a pain, holding one is simple.

You are smart enough to be a computer programmer if that's what you want. But y'know, it's not a big deal. You're not ambitious, you don't need pots of money, you can make a living doing a lot of things. Don't worry so much about it.

Yes, you are bisexual. No, this isn't terribly important, but I just thought you should know.

Against all odds, and for reasons that will often elude you, people actually will fall in love with you. More than one, even, and people you will love in return. I bet you don't believe me but it's true. Amazing, isn't it?

This said: when you're thinking about an involvement in terms of "this will be a disaster, I shouldn't do it"? You're right. You didn't listen to yourself so I don't see why you'd listen to me, but I feel obliged to point it out anyway.

Though, come to think of it, I'm pretty sure you'll predict doom for things that turned out well, too, so maybe that's not great advice. But my first two reciprocated crushes were disastrous* so you might want to hold out for #3. Just sayin'.

You will make approximate ten zillion mistakes in your life. The ones you will regret most will involve lying to other people. Don't do that. You'll figure this out in a couple of years on your on, but still.

It's okay if you don't take my advice. Everything turns out all right anyway.

Which is really all I want to say. It all works out. You'll have love and friends and happiness and sufficient money, and maybe all your dreams won't come true (particularly the ones about dragons, sorry), but it's a pretty good life.

You're going to be okay. You really are.

[ * Edit: these happened 20 years ago and the last was over with about 18 years ago. hotspurre is crush #3, for the insatiably curious. :) I know some people think that if a relationship ends, it must have been a mistake, but I actually only feel like those first two ones from 18+ years ago were mistakes. ]

Comments

[prester-scott.livejournal.com]

Would your 17-year old self have been able to parse "EV4R"?

[rowyn]

She was a smart girl; I'm sure she could figure it out.

OTOH, she might totally've concluded she needed to study English more. ("What *happened* to me? Ack!") :)

[pyat.livejournal.com]

Very wise words - I suspect I would say much the same to my 17 year old self, and maybe add that the people he envied in high school would not be worth envying in ten years, and the people he disdained would actually turn out really cool...

Also, I have friended you, if you don't mind. :) We seem to know several people in common.

[rowyn]

Apart from my then-circle of friends (all but one of whom I've completely lost touch with), I don't really remember any of the people from my high school days. They didn't leave an impression on me; I don't think they were important to me at the time, either.

And certainly I don't mind you adding me. Greywolf's mentioned you often. Hi there! :)

[wildcard-47.livejournal.com]

Being a kid sucks. It gets better the older you get.
Truer words were never spoken! :) Every year I find myself having more and more fun. I think it's because I've finally gotten comfortable in my own skin -- which is always a good thing.

I like reading and writing these type of memes; they make me feel optimistic about the future by giving "advice" to the past.

[rowyn]

Yeah, writing this cheered me up a bit, too. :)

I want to write one to my future self, too. But then again, the whole journaling process is pretty much that. Notes from the past to the future. :)

[circuit-four.livejournal.com]

Could you cc: a copy of this to me@17? 'Cause it applies remarkably well! n.n

[telnar.livejournal.com]

Which is really all I want to say. It all works out.

I strongly agree. In my view, part of recognizing that it's all going to work out involves understanding that life can be quite happy overall without whatever nit one is focused on at a given instant ending well. Remembering that can make having the nit go badly seem less significant.